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Friday, October 28, 2011

drama queen

Being sick, drinking tea, listening to sappy slow songs, & cuddling my pets has forced me to think about         "the MOVE". I am going to go on a major ramble sesh so brace yourselves.

J & I have been arguing soooo much. Well the J&J argument typically lasts 5-10 minutes and then we make up 5 minutes later. But we do these little upsets about three times a day. Somedays only once but we generally like to give it a go three times in a 24 hour span. Sad, right? We are newlyweds we are supposed to not be able to keep our hands off one another and have stupid blissful look on our faces. We are totally in love and happy but this move is draining us.

J accepted the position in Riding Mountain National Park. I am not the least bit happy about this. It's totally amazing that we will be close by to our families and friends but I have lived in MB for 23 years of my life and I'm over it. Ideally we wanted to end up back there later in life, but not while we are young. I am so fearful of being stuck. J jumped on the idea of moving to Manitoba because right now living in Cape Breton they can only offer him seasonal employment which is nine months. Manitoba is 12 months. You can see how this would benefit us financially. But the thing is we are not struggling out here. We had an extremely expensive year this year. With our wedding & friends and families weddings. We weren't being careful with our money at all, and we still made it by. J just feels alot of pressure as he is the sole provider. I get that, I hate that I'm totally dependent on J. If I could work year round I totally would, it's just that we are living in a very remote community. One of the MANY perks of marrying J is that I get to be the gypsy lady I always yearned to be.  I can't wait to explore Canada with him. I realize I am treating our move like it's the end of the world (and it's totally not) but I just really didn't picture living there anytime soon. Here were my thoughts before J applied for the transfer....

 We hang out in the beautiful place we call home with our sweet little babes for a couple of years. Explore every inch of this place, and then we move to somewhere totally different like Iqaluit, Yukon, or Gwaii Haanas. Bank some cash and THEEEEENN move back to Manitoba. Raise our kids there. Then who knows?

See, I had it all planned out! Maybe it's just the control freak coming out of me and hating the fact my life plans have suddenly been reversed on me. I wish he didn't apply for MB and only applied for the other much "cooler" year round positions. Ugh and the thought of another move so soon is painful to me. We just moved half way across Canada only a year ago.

Truthfully, I am happiest here. I love our simple life. I absolutely love the landscape. One wiff of that ocean makes everything so perfect again. The rolling mountains in my backyard. I love our house, I love that we are a two minutes walk away from a gorgeous beach and we have a forest right beside us with a beautiful brook flowing through it. I love MOST of our neighbours haha. I really love the people here. Right away, J & I felt apart of the community. I have always had a problem with people being catty towards me and not once have I ever felt that. The Maritimes has showed me nothing but the best.

I am mostly happy in Manitoba too. We have our family close by. I have the best friends in the world and many of them live in MB. Riding Mountain is one of the prettier spots in MB, it's not as remote as living out here. I will make the best of it. I am just finding it really hard to get in the mind set that we are actually moving and J isn't going to change his mind. Once we find a place we are both interested in I am sure I will get excited. J will be moving in December. I am going to MB for a bit for my bffs wedding and then probably coming back here? It's hard to say because I doubt we will find a place in a month. We have to think about where we would put EVERYTHING we own. I don't want to put it all in storage somewhere that would be a pain. We also have 3 pets to travel with as well. So much to do.

I WANT TO MOVE I LOVE MANITOBA I WANT TO MOVE I LOVE MANITOBA

2 comments:

  1. Moving can definitely be stressful and cause frustration, I just moved in August too.
    But, sometimes it's for the better and you have to look at the positive side of things.
    Smile, go kiss your man, and enjoy the time together! No arguments darlin'!

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  2. Hello, thank you for following my blog!

    I see you through a rough time, but be positive everything will be fine. Love is the greatest thing in the world and you have love, so you have everything to be happy and overcome difficulties. For more than one change is scary and let us down, we always discover new things and that in most cases is good and helps us see things in another way.
    Be strong! A big kiss *

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